50 Weird Thoughts I've Had During COVID-19
Cos we've all gone a bit...strange.
Should I start a fitspo Instagram with no training or experience or interest in fitness?
Should I become a vet assistant? Facebook wants me to.
Omg. I should do a course and become a psychologist.
I'm gonna read 50 books.
No. I'm gonna watch 50 shows. TV is basically reading without wasting trees.
I'm gonna start a business!
Eh, who can be fucked understanding organising their own Super?
This is the time. I will finally invest in the COVID vaccine and become a squillionaire.
How do I invest?
I do not have funds to invest.
I'm gonna start baking.
Hey, Maccas is on UberEats with free delivery now! No need to bake.
I'm gonna clean every surface of this house.
I'm gonna be hot af and work out every day in quarantine and come out looking like Rihanna.
So, I'm married, and we are a fat couple. As long as we are okay with it, it's finnneee.
Maybe I should just fly to London and quarantine for two weeks like yolo and do my job from there?
Should I buy a designer face mask and gloves?
I should write a novel.
I should write a film script and tv show and definitely will get famous.
I should also nap.
Maybe I'll knit or crochet.
Ooh, a dog on Instagram! Maybe I should get my dog Maple a friend.
I should finally Marie Kondo my house and get rid of junk.
Oooh, memory boxes from 1996. I will store you in a safe space.
This will be nice. Will and I can hibernate and learn more about each other.
I CURSE THE DAY YOU WERE BORN.
I should book a spontaneous trip interstate when this is over.
I will never financially recover from this.
I should set up Zooms every night so I'm not bored.
I don't want to do ANY of that!
Man Trump is nuts. Maybe I should be a politician.
So much backlash though, need compliments to live.
I should do a psychology course.
Wait. I hate studying.
I should cook dishes from my family's Czech heritage!
I hate cleaning and buying one-off products and the supermarket and everything about this.
I should get another dog.
Can I pay someone to walk mine?
Maybe I should start a Youtube channel.
What is TikTok?
My hands are dry.
Should I botox my whole face and wax my own eyebrows?
I should become a beauty influencer.
Maybe I'll do a calligraphy course and write letters to people.
Is butter a carb?
Maybe I should start a website with my friend and write anything I want.
I should write an article about all the thoughts I have, that's interesting, yeah?
Why did I do that?
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