• Jessica Taylor Yates

The Block Recaps: Upstairs Week

Every 90s kid knows that stairs = rich.

My $7 red wine is not gonna come outta that. Source: Houzz


*Spoilers ahead*


So, I didn't really understand this week. What did 'Upstairs' mean? Turns out, not even the contestants understood, with a mixed bag ranging from lounge rooms, offices and bedrooms to home cinemas and toilets. I’m your resident work-from-home (WFH) judge, here to talk about what we at home really think of the reveals from our but humble one-story homes. Let's go!

Seriously, who decided to capture the judges and make them wiggle?

All of us. Source: GiPHY


Harry and Tash (1920s)


Well, by now the eras are a distant memory, aren't they? Apply sometimes, when it suits the judges.


What we were hoping for:

So if I could get sponsored and get one of these free lights after giving them free advertising every week, that'd be great. Source: HGTV, Tinger Feng, Pinterest


What we got:


Upstairs Area

Tranquil? Yes.1920s? No. Source: 9now


So. This was the first we've seen of the post-2020-home, and their clever utilisation of turning an upstairs area into an office paid off. I love where they've situated it looking into the trees. You just wouldn’t feel as trapped in your sad little cubicle (am I the only one set up on a trestle table in the hallway, or?) It was smart not sacrificing a bedroom to do it as well. It’s a lovely office you would almost look forward to working at (I said, almost). That said, the styling and overall design is pretty boring. It’s all very...square and bare bones. No pieces stand out to me and feel they could have had fun with that bench, more curves (1920s damn it!) and colour.


Bedroom

It's like that room you always feel safe in at nana's. Source: 9now


I will give them props for giving it a go with styling. Still nothing to do with the 20s, but I’m a sucker for a rounded bedhead, the cabinetry gives great space and the little sitting area is nice (although in real life, does anyone just sit on a chair or couch in their bedroom to like, ponder? Wouldn’t you either sit on a lounge in the living room or get in bed? Or is it just somewhere to chuck my socks? Is it the Husband Chair while I’m getting ready? Tell me!)

The colours aren't really for me, they’re very...passive, but at least that could be easily swapped out.


An overall good use of the bones of the house, would prefer bolder styling.


WFH Judge: 7.5/10

The Block Judges: 28/30

George and Sarah (1940s)


Poor old George and Sarah, they can't catch a break. Maybe if they'd put in my sweet convo pit in their lounge last week things might be different, but alas, it was not to be. Our poor loveable losers went big, with a bedroom, study, and 'water closet' (hands up if you have called it this, ever!)


What we were hoping for:

Source: Pinterest, Decor Pad, Rescu


What we got:


Office

I want to play with the dog with the crown on it. Source: 9now


I appreciate the time they took with their office storage and styling. All the hanging artworks were really fun, with great storage and lighting; and it’s nice to be slightly tucked away if you need to work without kids or your dog coming up to you every two seconds (okay, I love it when my dog does it). I also don’t understand why all the houses have been stuck with those ugly black windows, so industrial.


Toilet

Can you say you love a toilet? I like how they have related the colours back to their other bathrooms with the pink and black, marble always looks lush, but I do agree with Neale that it could use a fun artwork or plant to spice things up. Not the best I’ve ever seen, but adding it was a good idea, it’s clean and nice. (Also, couldn't find a picture of this but will edit this article if one pops up).


Bedroom

This is so cute! Source: 9 now


Gee, a third space! This little girl's (or boy's!) bedroom was very cute, and I absolutely love the styling. It put a big smile on my face. I completely agree with Neale and thought the same, that it can be changed if you don’t have kids (which is what I had trouble with in Luke and Jasmine’s built-in bunk). The wallpaper suits any age or feel. Want all the kid stuff? Cool, toys and a bed ready to go. If not, chuck it on Facebook Marketplace and trade it in for your home gym.


An overall impressive use of space with a great family feel - and you can always use another ‘water closet.’


WFH Judge: 8 /10

The Block Judges: /30

Dan and Jade (1930s)


Mixed reviews on their cave-like lounge last week. At least they added some styling, I'll give that, even if some didn't like it. Now. Give us that Hollywood Regency we've been craving!


What we were hoping for:

Stainglass is always a good idea. Source: Recovetd, Transparent Glass Studio, Bunny Williams


What we got:


Upstairs area

Was Jade looking to create her own Jackson Pollock, or? Source: 9now


GREAT use of space! Double desks for two adults or kids, tv room upstairs for teens to make out to while you’re downstairs watching murder mysteries, very functional. I do agree with Shayna in that the styling isn’t as luxe. Aside from the desks and tv area, the couch and art area needs to go as they don't match at all - ick!


Bedroom

How is this 25k? Source: 9now


This was...pretty boring. Adding a bedroom, great idea. But it’s basic as. All the styling is around the bedding. Otherwise it’s really just four walls, but to be fair, it is a second space. It could be a guest room, office, wrapping presents station, ladies mimosa room...the possibilities really are endless...


Attic

I need this to keep my hoarding away from my husband. Source: 9now


Well again, a free pass on the above because of the attic cos yes! It’s a really good idea, and didn’t need to be over styled. They had exactly what you’d want in there - luggage, shelving, and a potential for your 13 year olds to play 7 Minutes In Heaven.


Overall, bad styling (why say “We’re not stylists”...do I want to pay $3m for a place styled by someone who says this?) but cannot deny the great use of space.


WFH Judge: 8/10

The Block Judges: /30

Luke and Jasmine (1910s)


I personally liked their lounge the best last week, but I know the judges were real salty about that heater. Do people actually use these? I'm intrigued. I have a fire in my house I've used exactly zero times cos it is nowhere near the tv. I think people like to fantasise about reading a book near the fire, but end up scrolling Instagram in front of The Block instead. Anyway.


What we were hoping for:

Sweet opulence. More! Source: Houzz


What we got:


Upstairs Area

Did anyone else feel like Darren was two seconds away from mounting that big white door that they used to enter this room? Anyway. Source: 9now


I love it. Isn’t this beautiful? It is hard to be elegant, beachy and homely at the same time and they absolutely nailed it. Like, I really want this, more than I want carbs after trying a week without. All the white and gold, the cosy couch, the in-built office, and I’m a sucker for built-in shelves. It feels so comfortable and I would feel sooo fancy at that desk. I couldn’t care less about the curtains and carpet, it felt like the judges were inventing issues.


Bedroom

They’re dominating on the style front for me this week. Source: 9now


This house is the most cohesive with its Hamptons-esque feel they got on track with in Week Two. I’ll admit I don’t love the green feature wall or arwork, but the wicker bed head is a fantastic carry on with the rest of the home, and I probably would have continued on this colour scheme with the bedding.


Overall, I don’t know if it is 1910s, but it’s great Hamptons vibes and I dig it.


WFH Judge: 9/10

The Block Judges: /30

Jimmy and Tam (1950s)


Guys, you broke me with your lounge last week. Seriously:

I'm triggered. Source: Tenor


So, I was hoping hey would make it up to me, big time. What we were hoping for:

Not gonna lie. I wanted to see some weird 50s shit. Source: Themerooms, Elle Decor, Design Art House


What we got:


Upstairs Area

Sidenote: What’s with the heavy indoor barn doors? Source: 9now


This room was pretty...meh. I dunno, maybe I’m puting too much pressure, but like...this is the team who gave us THIS:

#neverforget. Source: 9now


What’s happened? Why aren’t they crazy colourful Jimmy and Tam anymore? I don’t know why they are toning it down so much, it’s really boring and basic and I just feel they are so much better than this. Up the ante!


Bedroom

Thank you for listening. Source: 9now


I totally agree with Shayna that it gives a sense of luxury. This is probably the best Block bedroom this week, and is a bit hard to fault. Some may find it over the top, but it flows with the rest of their bedrooms. The colours are eye-popping without being overwhelming, everything blends well together with the wallpaper and bedding, and the cabinetry is neat and practical - always love an area to put mah face on.


Overall, THIS is why we love you, Jimmy and Tam! Bring it to the big spaces, not just Bed, Bath...we want Beyond!


WFH Judge: 7/10

The Block Judges: /30

____


Wrap it up: I think we all knew Sarah and George had it in the bag because they needed a win, but it was between them and Dan and Jade for good use of space...plus, we all needed to see that car karaoke party at the end, so I'm all for it.


Missed a recap? Catch up on all The Block action here. We're back every Sunday with WFH Judge thoughts on reveals with Large Almond Latte.


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